Well, it's been QUITE a while since you've heard from me. Between work and moving and barely being home, my creative juices have had no room to flow. But you wanna know the truth? I really need to call myself out on something. All that's a very convenient excuse not to face one of my flaws.
   I knew starting a blog would open some kind of door. It could have been developing new friendships, or having a creative outlet. Turns out there was a mirror behind the opened door that made me see my soul in ways I never have.
 I began spelunking through the caves of my mind and found a few stalagmites of neuroses I never knew were there. I'm a perfectionist to a fault. There are so many things I could and should do, but I don't because it may not turn out perfectly.
It's funny-- I was so afraid of starting this very blog because I might fail at it. "I might not word things perfectly. Or be disciplined about writing regularly. Or have anything interesting to say." So then I said nothing. My subconscious seemed to whisper, "People can't evaluate nothing." After some intensive soul-searching, I knew the truth. Nothing doesn't express ideas or touch hearts or make people giggle. Nothing is has no meaning."
In letting my perfectionism conquer me, I achieved EXACTLY what I feared. Failure. I've been a prime example that you miss 100% of the shots you don't take.With all that said, I can't promise I will continue with this blog. I want to, because that would mean I got over myself and out of my head and could just have some fun talking with you guys. And understand, this isn't just about the blog. The blog is a symptom of something I need to overcome-- myself. It's not an easy thing to do.
Feels good to be honest. Wish me luck. :)